Lemons and Basil

Looking Back on Our Wedding with Borrowed and Blue!

Disclaimer: If wedding stories aren’t your thing, feel free to delete this post and stay tuned for the next one, I promise we’ll be back to clean-eating recipes in no time!

With the birth of our sweet baby boy, nearly 8 months ago, our lives are so different today than they were eight years ago. It’s hard to believe that Josh and I have been married for 8 years now. In many ways it feels like it was just yesterday that we took the plunge and committed our lives to one another. And yet in other ways, it feels longer, in a good way. In a way that says, we’ve been through so much, and we’re stronger because of it, with so many wonderful memories and adventures to hold dear, and so much still to come.

We love looking back at that special day, what it meant for two to become one, and the years that have passed since then, bringing us to today, having become a family of three. So when Borrowed & Blue came to us to ask all about our big day and our wedding planning experience, we jumped at the opportunity!

A quick note from B&B before we get started!

“It wasn’t long before Lemons and Basil became our go-to Nashville blog for all things edible. And since Borrowed & Blue is all about Nashville weddings, we naturally had to ask Kaylee to share some of her and Josh’s photos from the big day. That’s when we really became hooked, and why we are asking her today all about her wedding planning experience. As a tried-and-true Nashville bride, we’re coming to Kaylee as the expert.” – Stephanie, Nashville Market Specialist

Here’s my Q&A with Borrowed & Blue: {I hope you enjoy a little look into our past!}

Describe your wedding in six words. Personal, authentic, unconventional, winter, fun, full-of-love 

What made your wedding unique? The music – music has been such a huge part of our lives. Josh moved to Middle TN to major in Music Business at MTSU and he was leading worship for the college group at the church I started going to, which is how we met. Leading worship, discovering new music, and essentially music of all sorts have been his passion since he was little. So it was only natural that our music would be unconventional and songs that were personal to us. I walked down the aisle to Hoppipolla by Sigur Ros, an Icelandic band that Josh has loved for years and they’ve become a favorite of mine as well. After we said our vows and he kissed his bride :) we then walked/danced out to an Anberlin cover of The Promise, originally recorded by When in Rome.

What was your favorite detail from your wedding day? I’m sure it sounds cliché, but my favorite detail from the day was being surrounded by everyone we loved. To have all our family from both sides and our closest friends gathered together to celebrate us joining our lives together is an incredible thing. It was such an honor to have their love and support.

What is your most memorable moment from that day? Shortly after Josh proposed I asked him if he would be willing to sing at our wedding. It was an immediate and unwavering “no”. He went on to share that he was afraid he wouldn’t feel free to just enjoy the day, but would instead be nervous throughout the service knowing he’d soon be singing in front of not only our family and friends, but several of his coworkers in the Music Industry. I was disappointed, but understood and dropped it. However, part way through the service, our pastor said that Josh had a little something prepared for me, and out of no where, two of his groomsmen jumped on the drums and guitar, and Josh was handed his guitar and he sang an absolutely beautiful song that he had written for me. I was shocked, overwhelmed, and flooded with tears. I loved every word of it. He later explained to me that he only wanted to sing at our wedding if he was able to write a song for me that he was happy with, he didn’t want to sing someone else’s song. So rather than give me a “maybe”, he decided to let it be a complete surprise. <3

If you could go back and do your wedding over again, what would you change? Oh goodness, everything and nothing! Not only are trends and styles continuously changing, but we now have Pinterest and DIY ideas are so prevalent! We did everything ourselves and at the time, it was perfect for what we were able to afford, but 8 years later, and after 6 years of working in high-end residential design, and helping with several weddings, I feel like there are so many things I would do different with the colors, flowers, etc. I also feel like I am more confident in who I am and have found my “style” if you could call it that. My hair, makeup, and clothes are all a little different now than they were then, so looking back, I’m critical of myself, but it’s the younger version of myself, and I was still figuring out who I was and who I wanted to be.

What would you keep the same? I’d marry Josh! I guess that goes without saying :) Aside from that, the time I spent with my mom and sister planning it all. It was such a special time, and after the last painful few years, with my mom suffering from a neurological disease, that took her life in January of this year, when I look back at that special day and think about what I would keep exactly the same, it’s the people and the time we spent together. I cannot imagine my wedding having come and gone and my mom not be apart of it. Looking back at these pictures, brings so much emotion, as I see my mom, alive and well, beautiful and loving. She and my Grandma made the food that was served at the reception, she helped pick out my dress, addressed all our invitations for us…she loved Josh and was so excited for the two of us. And my sister was there beside me every step of the way, throwing me a wonderful bridal shower, helping make flower arrangements, wedding favors, and the list goes on. Regardless of the venue, colors, decorations, etc. in the end, those things fade, but the memories created with the people we love will be forever cherished.    

What was your biggest obstacle during the planning period? Probably time and budget, two obstacles that I would guess affect a lot of brides-to-be! I was still in school when Josh and I got married. He proposed in May of 2007 and we knew we didn’t want much more than a 6 month engagement, but that meant we had to have a winter wedding, and would need to do it over the Christmas break – eek! We love all things outdoors and would have loved an outdoor wedding in the Spring or Fall, but with me still in school, and not wanting to wait a year or more, we decided to make the most of it and face the cold!

I was studying Interior Design and working part-time, so nearly all my efforts were focused on those two things. We did as much planning as we could in the summer before the Fall semester started, and then as soon as it let out for Christmas break, it was all things wedding!

As for the budget, we were young and had little to no money to put towards the wedding ourselves. We were overly grateful for what my parents were able to afford and felt it was important to stay within that set budget. I wasn’t that girl who had dreamed of her wedding since she was five and had every detail mapped out. I just knew I wanted to marry my best friend, and that’s exactly what I did!

How did you overcome that obstacle? We had help and worked hard with the time we had! As soon as school let out and I was able to focus on nothing but the wedding, my mom, sister and I spent time finalizing the last details, making the wedding favors, folding programs, and figuring out the remaining flower and decorations. That time with my sister, soaking in her love and guidance, staying up late, laughing and creating memories, that time was so sweet and something I’ll never forget. And while so much of my time was spent with my sister, my mom was busy coordinating and planning all the food for the reception and enlisting friends and family members to help serve the food and drinks. Simultaneously, Josh took care of all the music and designed the program, while his parents took care of the rehearsal dinner. It was such a team effort, which not only helped with the time issue, but also helped tremendously with the budget, everyone helped in the areas of their strengths, and together we not only created so many wonderful memories, but we were able to accomplish so much within a reasonable budget!

What do you wish you would have known before you started planning your wedding? That perfection does not exist, and to not stress or strive for it, but rather enjoy every moment spent with your fiance, family and friends.

As I mentioned briefly above, my mom passed away this past January, January 5th to be exact, on Josh’s and my eight year wedding anniversary. She had been sick since the end of 2013 with a neurological disease, an extremely rare and rapidly progressing disease. The last 2-3 years have been terribly heartbreaking for our family. I never once thought when I got married on January 5th, 2008 that I’d only have another five good years with my mom, nor that she was would leave this earth eight years later, to the day. So what I wish I’d have known, and my advice to soon-to-be brides planning their wedding…just enjoy the time with those around you, soak up every moment and memory. And remember that at the end of this very special day, you’ll be joined for life with your very best friend, and ready to start a new chapter in your life together. So let the small things go, extend yourself grace, and grant yourself the freedom from striving for perfection.

What advice would you give to couples who choose to DIY? Enlist help from those who have offered or want to share a part in this special event in your life. I tend to put a lot of pressure on myself, and want things to be done a certain way. The older I get, the more I have grown to realize this about myself. But as I continue to grow in age and hopefully maturity, I’m learning that to not accept the gift of help from someone, robs them from sharing the talents God has given them. So let people help you in the areas where they excel, and spend your time on the things that depend upon your own strengths, or are very personal and important to you. Because truthfully, there are a lot of details to consider when planning a wedding, and the more you do yourself, the more time you’ll need – but don’t take on so much that you end up exhausted and overwhelmed by the time your day arrives.

Any other advice for couples just getting engaged? Just be true to yourselves. This day is about the two of you and what you hold dear. It’s easy to get wrapped up in making decisions based on what you think others might expect of you, but that brings about a burden that is not yours to bear. I think most importantly, regardless of your budget or your available resources, make decisions that will keep the two of you united, and put in place whatever boundaries are needed to ensure there is no division created through stress or a difference of opinions.

My last piece of advice, don’t compare your wedding to those of your friends or what you see in magazines. It’s great to draw inspiration from those things, but I’ve found that comparing never leads to a good outcome. So often, I think we {women} put such tremendous pressure on ourselves to plan the perfect wedding – we want to wear the perfect dress, have the perfect decorations, select the perfect venue, colors, season, band, etc – and we get caught up in it all, only to feel we’ve fallen short when compared to what someone else planned or was able to obtain with their budget. In the end, it’s your special day, and at the end of it, you’ll be married to your best friend. So make the big decisions based on what YOU want, not what you think others expect, and then…let the smaller details fall into place and just enjoy the day, and soak in every second of it, because it goes by SO fast.

Thanks again to Borrowed & Blue for reaching out, I had so much fun pondering these questions and reflecting back on our wedding! Be sure to check out their site for Nashville wedding venues, vendors, and more.

Here’s our Easter picture from this past Sunday, now a family of three. That little boy brings more joy than I know how to put into words, my heart is so full of love for these two!